I walk back into my yoga studio, returning from a meeting with my specialists and processing the fact that I have Glaucoma and lost the sight in my left eye.
I grab my passport, jump in my car and drive to the airport.
I want to run. I don’t want to deal with this.
I sit there contemplating for hours, then decided that I have to stay here and go through this.
For the next 6 months, I was observing and listening and reacting from time to time. I was being scared and allowing fear to come in as i started to see my vision depleting each day more and more..Having to make adjustments in my day to day life but also in my yoga practice, I had to slow down, to change and to really surrender.
Things really became scary and real when i was teaching out East and walking home at dusk and was unable to see the street sign to get me home, so having to use SIRI on my phone to guide me home through tears.
Coming back home, i found myself in a place of fear, of no options, of vulnerability.
My Dad called me and my Dad is Mr. Research- i love him for it, He said “Kevin I’ve been up for days looking into stem cell treatment for your eyes”. He had called a hospital in China and asked every question under the rainbow. When he brought this option to me, i was unsure as it was a new treatment but my Dad persisted and sent all the information to my doctors who then gave their full support, so with that it cleared some fear.
Now the question was how, as the treatment was $30,000,that i didn’t have, My beautiful partner Andrea took it onto herself to start a GOFUNDME Page to raise money for me, without my knowledge! It blew me away, as people from all the communities where i teach globally came together and raised this money in less than a month.
I’ve always really struggled with receiving and here it was. i didn’t have a choice but to let that go and receive with a grateful heart. It was so hard but Andrea said to me “This is your Karma and you give so much, there has to be a balance., By allowing yourself to receive you are giving the other person the permission to do their work.”
On April 4th i travelled with my parents to Thailand to start a 3 week stem cell treatment. From day one, the care of the doctors and hospital blew me away. It was like a family that was there with you every step of the way- through 6 injections-2 spinal taps, bandaged off from the world. I was really learning to receive, as my mother had to feed me and my father had to hold my hand and guide me around. I had to really go inside and it was there where i really saw myself for the first time in my life. It was there that I was able to forgive myself from past things and let my past mistakes be my greatest gifts and really love myself for all of me. I am still processing now and so much continues to rise up from the depths and I’m so grateful, because this life and all of life is rooted in unconditional love.
This has been the most challenging journey of my life and I am grateful for every second of it. My left eye was black and it has now regained its peripheral sight. As the stem cells grow (I call them my little angels) over the next 4-6 months, we are hopeful that more vision will come, so I continue to nurture and nourish and love them each day. I am so grateful for this journey and this treatment
Love Light Liberation
© Lightening Magazine 2016